Moving in together is becoming an increasingly common housing solution for older adults. Learn about the balance of privacy and togetherness and which features support a positive, long-lasting arrangement.
Counteracting internalized ageism
October 9 is Ageism Awareness Day. Prejudice against older adults is so widespread we often inflict it upon ourselves without even thinking about it. See what you can do to counteract this way of thinking.
Estate planning for blended families
September 16 is National Stepfamily Day. This month we look at the issues of blended families when you consider how to divide up the estate fairly between the “new” spouse, first-union children, and any subsequent children born from the new marriage.
Writing a memoir, with a twist
If you are thinking of writing a memoir, consider a different approach, one that recounts how you came to hold the values you believe are important in life. Rather than a chronological recounting, it provides a view of you through the lens of the wisdom you have gathered and the lessons learned.
Key screening tests covered by Medicare
“An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Next after that is early detection! Learn about key screening tests that Medicare covers to help you catch problems before they go into full bloom.
Do you have “helicopter kids”?
Much as your kids mean well, do you worry they are going to step in and start making decisions about your life? You’re not alone! Rather than distance yourself from them, consider strategies to address their concerns while also maintaining your independence.
Disclosing a dementia or MCI diagnosis
Once you have come to terms with your diagnosis, it’s a big step to let others know. You can’t control their reactions, but you can help them learn more about your condition and how best to support you.
Choosing a health care agent
April 16 is National Healthcare Decisions Day. To honor the importance of advance planning, we present issues to consider when you appoint someone to make healthcare decisions for you should you become unable to voice your own wishes (a coma, dementia, under anesthesia during surgery). This person is known as your “health care agent.”
What is a “life plan community” (aka “CCRC”)?
If you want to make one last move to where you can receive all the levels of care you might need all in the same place, you may want to consider a continuing care retirement community (CCRC). From independent living with high-end amenities to assisted living, memory care, and skilled nursing, it’s all available on a single campus.
Living apart together
If you don’t wish to remarry or live together, there is a growing trend of older adult couples keeping their respective homes while enjoying a romantically exclusive and intimate relationship. They are freed from expectations of domestic chores and eventual caregiving, yet enjoy more emotional support and companionship than if they were simply dating.
Medicare: Wellness and prevention
Medicare provides a yearly opportunity to address prevention and wellness with your doctor. These visits are 100 percent paid for by Medicare. But they are NOT the “annual physical” you were accustomed to in younger years. It’s wise to understand the difference.
Making friends in later life
Good friends are good for the soul—and for your physical health! Loneliness and social isolation create health risks equivalent to smoking fifteen cigarettes a day. But the older we get, the more we need to intentionally cultivate new friends.
What is IRMAA?
Have you been told you owe Social Security extra money (IRMAA) for your Medicare coverage? Learn more about this significant but little-known fee and what you can do to reduce it.
Crime proofing your home
Seniors experience property crime thirteen times more often than violent crime. Burglary is the most common. (Interestingly, it typically occurs between noon and 4:00 pm!) The average loss is roughly $3,000, although that does not account for the emotional impact: A profound sense of violation and vulnerability.
Sharing your home
The boomer generation meets the Golden Girls. Homesharing is on the rise! And for good reason. It’s an affordable alternative that allows for shared expenses, help around the house, and light companionship.
Saying “no” when your kids ask for money
As a parent, it can be challenging to keep your wallet closed, especially if there’s a history of extended financial support. But there are ways to encourage your child’s solvency while minimizing the risk to your relationship.
“With a little help from our friends”: The Village movement
Are you looking for alternative ways to age in place and get the support services you need—now and in the future? The Village project is a national network of grassroots self-help groups that empower older adults to affordably assist each other as volunteers, reducing isolation and building community in the process.
Medicare coverage while traveling
One of the joys of retirement is the ability to travel. But you may not have Medicare coverage where you go. The rules for traveling outside the United States, and even outside your local network, are very strict and can be very limiting. Learn about the general coverage options for original Medicare, Medicare Advantage, and Part D plans. Also gain tips about purchasing travel insurance.
Solo aging: Eyes wide open
Aging comes to us all. What makes solo aging different is the need to be more proactive about arranging for help. Twenty-two percent of older adults acknowledge they will need to take care of themselves. (Even if you are partnered now or have children, you are wise to consider the possibility of solo aging because, well, things can change … death, divorce, estrangement. In that light, we are all potential solo agers.)
Getting rid of your stuff
Once you get beyond the sentimental value of your belongings, you are still up against the logistics of how to get things out of your nest. Some stuff is easier to pass along to family than other stuff. Options for what’s left over: Sell, donate, or just “get rid of it!”
Thriving through life transitions
Change is the only constant. And as we enter our later years, it seems the changes are more frequent. Do you sense a transition occurring in your life? Whether the change was of your own making or seems thrust upon you, there are strategies to help you weather the process. And at the least, not feel so alone.
Should you move (closer to your kids)?
The most common reason to move in later years is to be closer to children and grandchildren. Regardless of your reason for relocating, unless you plan to live with family, there will be many hours of the day when you are just plain newbies in town. How will you spend your time? If proximity to younger kin is compelling your thoughts, clarify the role you want to play and see if it’s a shared vision.
“My kids treat me like a bank”
When an adult child asks for money, it’s hard to say no. You want to respond to a need. But perhaps your child perceives that you don’t need all you have, or that they’re simply requesting some of their inheritance, just a bit early. Before you answer, ask for time to think it over.
Adding smart home safety features
“Smarts” are in the eye of the beholder. What’s a smart home “gotta have” for one is simply “cute but unnecessary” to another. Check out the top recommendations for older adult smart home safety features.
Is cohousing for you?
Cohousing is like a retirement community in that it is a group of residents in individual, private domiciles. Plus, there are shared facilities for group activities. What’s different is that retirement communities are created and run by a developer. Cohousing communities are created by the people who will live in the buildings. All members hold an equal investment—personal and financial—in the process of creating and running the community. Decision making is shared and is usually by consensus.
Should you change to Medicare Advantage?
Open enrollment presents you with an insurance crossroad once a year and, often, heavy pressure to join a Medicare Advantage plan. It’s best to look twice before you jump, however.
Long-distance grandparenting: Toddlers and kids
If you are like 68% of grandparents, you live too far away for regular interactions with your grandchildren. No reading bedtime stories or soothing little tears. No ticklefests or hands-on projects. These casual yet meaningful activities just aren’t an option.
Aging in place: Pros and cons
A vast majority of older adults (77%) say they want to remain in their own homes as they age. Of course! Home is comfortable: We know where everything is—in the house, and also in the neighborhood and town. Friends, doctors, grocery store. We know how to get around quickly and easily. Plus, the emotional benefits of memories, identity, and history are baked into the walls of a home. But for many, the concept of staying put is based on how things are now and doesn’t factor in the changes that are bound to come.
Smartwatches as medical alerts
Especially for older adults living alone, the ability to summon help in the event of an emergency—such as a fall—is a very real concern. With a cell phone in your purse or pocket, it’s easy to feel well set. Think again. The bathroom is where most falls occur. Do you take your cell phone in when you are using the toilet? Or taking a shower? And what if you hit your head and are unconscious? With a brain bleed, minutes count! But who wants to wear one of those telltale pendants? Fortunately, with the advent of smartwatches, there are stylish options that do not carry such stigma.
Decluttering: Why is it so hard?
Three out of five (61%) of adults over 60 feel they have more stuff than they need. And yet many of us find it emotionally painful to cull our belongings.
While the physical labor of “right-sizing” is daunting, perhaps more powerful—and surprising—is the emotional challenge.
Increasing concentration and focus
Do you find yourself more easily distracted these days? There is good reason: Concentration is about keeping what’s useful top of mind while at the same time suppressing thoughts that distract from your primary objective. As we age, the “executive” center of the brain becomes less able to sort out distractions. It’s a filtering process that requires heavy brainpower. Many people worry that lapses in concentration are an early sign of Alzheimer’s. Not necessarily. While memory and focus are related, they are not the same thing.
What is “concierge medicine?”
Are you tired of long waits to get an appointment? Rushed visits? Not being able to talk to your doctor by phone or communicate via email? You aren’t alone. Doctors dislike it too. But because most physicians today are employees of a large medical group, they are required to complete 30–40 patient visits per day. Appointments are set to last no more than 15 minutes. This is necessary to manage a typical patient load of 4,000.
Are enhanced “hearables” for you?
If you have trouble participating in conversation in a noisy room or tend to want the TV volume turned up, you might want to investigate a new category of device called an enhanced “hearable.” Up until now, there have been few options short of a hearing aid for people with only mild hearing loss. The best have been “personal sound amplification devices” that fit in the ear like a hearing aid. While reasonably affordable and easily purchased online, they have the disadvantage of amplifying all sounds, even the ones you don’t want to hear.
“I’m engaged! Why aren’t my kids happy for me?”
Are you enjoying a love you never thought you’d feel again? It’s hard to be happy, though, if your children rain on your romance. Are they being selfish? Not necessarily. An in-depth study of “adult stepfamilies” revealed how disruptive it is when a parent gets involved with a new partner later in life.
What’s in an Alzheimer’s test?
There is no single test that can determine if a person has Alzheimer’s disease. But a combination of several different tests can identify if memory and thinking problems are due to one of the many conditions that result in symptoms of dementia. By process of elimination, doctors can determine what may be the root cause of thinking problems. Some conditions are treatable. Others are not.
Aging with purpose: Defining your true north
Study after study reveals that older adults with a sense of purpose, a sense of meaning in their lives, enjoy greater well-being and live longer than those without a life focus. They also have better cognitive and physical health and suffer less from depression, suggesting that purpose is an important component of a healthy and satisfying elderhood.
Shopping tips for Medicare prescription insurance (Part D)
From October 15 to December 7 each year, Medicare enrollees have the option to change their insurance plans. For prescription drug coverage, which is only offered by private insurance companies, it pays to shop around. Even if you have been happy with your current plan, drug prices and premiums change from one year to the next. It’s a good idea to compare. There could be hundreds of dollars at stake.
When your children won’t talk to you
If your adult child has cut off contact, you are not alone. An estimated 11% of parents are estranged from their adult kids. That’s 1:8. But you wouldn’t know it to hear others talk.
There is such a stigma around the issue that estranged parents rarely talk about it with others. Instead, they tend to cover things over.
Planning to “retire” from driving
Did you know that we usually outlive our ability to drive safely by six to ten years? As we age, we naturally modify how we drive to address physical changes: Stiff joints, poor vision, slow reflexes. But a time will come when it’s simply unwise to continue behind the wheel.
Age-friendly exteriors
When imagining an age-friendly house, many people think of ramps for wheelchairs and walkers. Indeed, ramps are essential—if and when they are needed. There are, however, modifications for the outside of a home that simply make daily life and basic maintenance easier. They help prevent falls by addressing the common conditions of arthritis, poor eyesight,…
Choosing a long-term care facility
Choosing an assisted living community, a continuing care retirement community (CCRC), or a memory care facility is a big decision. You want to get unbiased recommendations for a good match from the start.
How to pay for long-term care
Most people are surprised to learn that Medicare pays for only a limited amount of the daily care you are likely to need in your lifetime (about 14%).
Medicare covers only services delivered by medically trained professionals. That means you need to have savings or insurance and rely on a collection of local programs. Or family and friends who may be able to pitch in with labor or funds.
Choosing a home care provider
Allowing a stranger into your home can leave you feeling quite vulnerable. It’s important that you trust the individual and the company that does the background checks, verifies training, and puts together the schedule.
You also need to interview each company to find out pricing and minimum number of hours, and to see if they have independent quality ratings.
Assembling your support team
Your elder care support team will include friends and family, health care providers, and professional advisors. An Aging Life Care Manager can help you select wisely and coordinate these services effectively.
Paying for care at home
How you pay for care at home depends on whether the service is by medically trained staff or by nonmedical caregivers. Also, what you can mix and match in terms of community programs and help from friends and family.
Medicare pays only for care in the home that requires the skills of a nurse, nursing assistant, physical therapist, or other medically trained professionals.
Medical emergencies: Are you prepared?
Accidents by their very nature are unplanned. That doesn’t mean you need to be unprepared for a fall or a serious incident (e.g., a heart attack or stroke).
Those who are prepared and have a professional advocate, such as an Aging Life Care Manager, are more likely to get the care and the outcomes they desire. Plus, they can recuperate in a setting most in line with their personal needs and preferences.
What is a care manager?
Imagine your life as a movie. If you are the director, serves as your stage manager. He or she is a deeply knowledgeable guide (usually a nurse, social worker, or allied professional) who finds you high-quality help, arranges locations, and advises concerning needed services. s are part of a national organization with training requirements, codes…
Types of long-term care
In your elderhood, it may be that your best, most affordable option is a group care setting. Learn the difference between assisted living, memory care, skilled nursing (rehab), a nursing home, and a continuing care community (aka life plan community).
Home care
Support is available for those who wish to stay at home. However, one-on-one care is expensive. And it’s not always easy to find caregivers. Community services can sometimes be patched together.
To stay at home, it helps to have a knowledgeable person check in periodically who knows eligibility requirements and can supervise and coordinate all the players.